The big "D"

Being the human that I am, I knew that it would come and so it has.  The big "D". D-O-U-B-T! I have felt much doubt about this seminary adventure this past week.  Our goal was to have the house on the market by the end of April because we know spring is the best time to sell a house. It is now May and we have finished maybe 1/2 of what has to be done before we can list the house.  Every day seems to create something else that has to be done.  At first it was ok, I knew we were working every day on something that needed to be done no matter how small it seemed.  Now, we discovered that seminary classes start August 15th instead of mid-September like Gus thought.  So I let the D-O-U-B-T start creeping in that there is no way we can make it to Kentucky by then - WE DON'T EVEN HAVE OUR HOUSE FOR SALE YET! D-O-U-B-T!

Then my son calls us to say he is officially engaged.  We knew it was coming soon, but since it wasn't official it was easy not to think about it.  Now that it is real, I don't want to leave my baby!  Sometimes it crossed my mind that we would be almost 14 hours away from him. A few tears would drop and then I would put the thought aside until he called or sent me a message and then it would creep up again.  Now that there are wonderful wedding plans that will be going on only 3 hours away, it is now much harder to think about being 14 hours away.  D-O-U-B-T!

Added to those two big "D's", Zachary is really beginning to feel the reality that we are leaving family, friends, and the biggest thing to him - Ryan. Our house has been in total disorganization for a month now, in 30 days Gus will be unemployed, he doesn't have a new job, and we have no new place lined up to live in.  This has really begun to weigh on the mind of my 12-year-old and he had a huge meltdown last week.  He was so upset, my heart just broke for him. D-O-U-B-T!

On the flip side of all this, I am excited about all God is going to teach us through all this. I feel He is going to change us all beyond what we can imagine.  He is already teaching me that Carol, the order-loving, routine-needing, hates being out of my comfort zone, control-loving, doubting Thomas, can only survive this with His strength and His alone. NO D-O-U-B-T ABOUT THAT!